When I began this writing series I wanted to be sure to include a few practical processes and techniques to help those who found them beneficial. However, I do not in any way want to project the idea that being happy is difficult and the only way to achieve happiness is by following ANY step by step process!
One thing I struggled with a few years ago was over-thinking EVERYTHING. Unfortunately, the ‘What If’s’ plagued my thoughts and worrying about this or that engulfed a huge part of my days.
Therefore, the processes I discuss in this series were and are extremely helpful to me because they helped me learn how to finally stop the destructive chatter going on within myself.
The destructive chatter can be detrimental to the quality of life you’re experiencing, creating feelings such as doubt, fear, and worry. As discussed earlier in this series those feelings send out a vibration that attracts more like things (illnesses, loss of income, poor relationships…) into our experience which triggers those types of feelings even more!
Clearly I wanted to stop my negative chattering mind! What I discovered was I did not have the ability to STOP the chatter with determination to simply STOP thinking about them! The more I tried to stop the worrisome thoughts, the more I would think about them!
Give it a try—try to stop thinking about something, anything such as a Blue bird. Simply saying to your ‘logical’ mind “I am NOT going to think about that Blue bird anymore,” in most cases is only going to establish that Blue bird squarely in the forefront of your thoughts! However, if this logical determination works for you, BRAVO!!!
If you’re like me and stopping your thoughts doesn’t work, you need another tactic. Instead of trying to think the unwanted thought out of your mind, bring something entirely different into your thought stream for focus. Flood your mind with something pleasing and focus upon it, this will help to take the place of the old negative thoughts.
Whatever it takes to draw your focus off the negative—maybe listening to uplifting music, doing Yoga, exercising, watching a Youtube funny video, TV comedy, or just talking to one of your quirky friends will help.
Mediation has been an enormously useful tool for many people because in the quieting of your chattering mind, it helps to create a clear space, allowing in clarity and peace of mind.
Though, for me I have not yet been able to master the Meditation experience, so distraction of my focus is working best for me so far. I’ve read many how-to instructions but, for me personally trying to meditate, laying there conscious of my breathing and listening to a constant noise such as a fan doesn’t last long before… very soon the chatter starts on everything, (it goes something like this—boy, this ceiling needs painted…the walls and trim too, what color would look best, if I change the wall color we will need new bedding…) which defeats the whole purpose of meditation and quieting the mind.
And, of course the more I believe I can’t meditate the more this will be an experience in my life. The good thing is focusing on other things is working just fine for me and the point of this is for everyone to use WHATEVER works best for them to feel better as well!
Maybe there is someone out there who can through their sheer determination and willpower can stop the negative chatter within their mind but, I am not one of those people! The more I think about stopping a thought, the more thoughts of that topic will come pouring in and the worse I will feel!
There is no one perfect tool, technique or way of bringing yourself out of a distressing state of mind into happiness. Tap into what works best for you to feel better. Use your feelings as your guide—feeling better is your indicator that you’ve found what works!
I have learned and am still learning to shift my thoughts completely off worrisome topics to something better. I have experienced when I do this, solutions come unexpectedly and quickly regarding those previous troublesome topics.
To some quieting a chattering mind may seem silly and think ignoring problems is not facing reality and is just irresponsible. If being responsible means it makes you miserable, you are not doing yourself any good or anyone around you any benefit!
It is a continual process—that whole law of attraction thing; it’s no joke, just as real as the law of gravity!
As for me I prefer the good chatter 🙂
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